Whose fault is it REALLY?

I watched Dead Poets Society quite some times ago, maybe around last year. I first knew about the movie from the book I bought at a garage sale and it seemed to me like a good story. The book was written based on the movie so after reading the book, I just knew that I had to get a grip on the movie. Unfortunately, being in Indonesia like I am, it's sometimes very hard to find old movies. Good old movies. I tried searching every place I knew back then, but it was to no avail. So I only had the last option left. I watched it on Youtube. I never regretted it, because it was one of the most inspiring movie I've ever watched.

If you have watched the movie, you would probably have been left thinking after the movie ended. Neil, one of the character, had killed himself due to whichever reasons we were left to argue about. A discussion later on was raised on Dead Poets Society's Facebook group, asking the fans of the movie to express their opinions on who fault was it really that Neil committed the suicide. Here are some excerpts of the opinion.

Some agree that it was Neil's father's fault...

"It was Neil's father's fault. Acting wouldn't have hurt Neil going to med school so the father had no legitimate reason for not allowing him to do so. His father made him miserable and while it was Neil who pulled the trigger, if his father hadn't been so ignorant and harsh the suicide never would have happened." - Mike Darer

While some think that Neil himself was the one to blame...

"I think it was Neil's fault. Mr. Keating was trying to teach the boys to be individuals, not kill yourself. And, yes, Neil's father was an obastacle blocking Neil from his individualism but Neil, with some work, could have overcome. But he didn't work at it at all. He avoided the problem. In the end, his ultimate avoidance presented itself as suicide. Sure, Neil's father made life difficult but I'm not sure if I would blame him." - Emily Ouellette

"You guys are kinda missing the point since it was a suicide, the only person we can blame of Neil's death is well, Neil. Because neither Mr. Keating or Neil's father pulled the trigger. It was Neil. He made the choice to kill himself." - Stuart Benson

And Erica Baffa agreed with him,

"The above statement hit the nail on the head. In the end, Neil pulled the trigger, which made the scapegoating later all the more ridiculous. Then again, the "investigation" was encouraged by Neil's family, so in the end it's probably Neil's dad's fault that Keating lost his job." - Erica Baffa

Now here's what I think. I think, partially it's Mr. Keating's fault. He should've understood, or foreseen more clearly, that not all the boys had developed strong enough personality to discover who they really were. Some boys needed special and different approach than the others. Some found their own ways without his help. Like Knox, he found his own courage to talk to Chris through the poems, although it was true that Keating introduced them to the poems. It should be different with Neil. Neil's case wasn't the same as Knox, Mr. Keating couldn't just rely on the poems and expect Neil to figure out things by himself. And, I also sense Keating had a personal hope on him. Keating wanted Neil to succeed. I think it's the reason why he let down his guard a bit as a teacher whose job was to solely navigate his students' way, not telling him to go a certain way. His job was to SHOW what way might be the best for the student, but without pouring all his perspectives while he knew the student had high regard of his opinions. Keating took it a little bit too far when he told Neil that Neil should talk to his father or pursue his dream and crossed a boundary. He should've let Neil decide when was the best time to approach his own father and he should've prepared Neil until he developed a certain level of maturity before pushing him to do such confrontation which was clearly still being perceived as radical in society they were in. That way, Neil wouldn't be too fragile when obstacles hit him. I think Keating was too eager to see Neil succeed therefore he wasn't being as careful as he should be. I think he slipped and that's why he needed to leave because it was partly his fault.

I couldn't say any opinion was wrong because it can be interpreted from various perspectives. A girl has pointed out a very good point on how seeing this movie as we all should be. Here's what she said:

"Neil killed himself because at that moment, he had LIVED. "I went to the woods to live deliberately ... so that when it came time for me to die, I would not learn that I had not lived." Neil made the choice to kill himself. Mr. Keating wanted the boys, all of them, to make their own decisions for their own lives, so that when it came time for them to die, they would have lived by their own decisions. Neil's father was making deicisions for Neil, and Neil was still a minor, so it's not unusual in the 1950s for affluent parents to map out the lives of their children. Instead of growing a set, like Mr. Keating encouraged the boys to do, Neil killed himself. The movie isn't a disseratation on the reasons for suicide, it's an argument for living your life to the fullest. And it followed the traditional (and highly effective) formula of killing off one of the heroes so that the audience leaves thinking about what they've witnessed. If you don't kill one of the heroes, your message carries no weight. It's a happily ever after Disney story, whitewashed of all significance." - Erica Dunn

And her opinion solemnly closed the discussions for me.

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My great hope is to laugh as much as I cry; to get my work done and try to love somebody and have the courage to accept the love in return.

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I am lousy in explaining myself in words as I believe articulating something as complicated as personality stringed together in sentences does no justice to the profoundness in me. I may not know much but I know this much is true. I have morbid fascination over people's stories regardless where they came from or what background they grew up in. I indulge in their stories not because I'm nosy but because I find them enriching mine. I wish to be awed by the possibilities and differences I find in people from all over the world and I never hesitate to befriend them if the attraction is likewise. I am a creature of language, emotions, rationality experiences, comprehension, and love. I use words and ideas to change the world, I cling to my emotions and rationality to yield decisions, I base my decisions on experiences, I define skewed things I find through a weak attempt of comprehension and I love almost everyone.